The reality is that one day I feel as if my mind is going to go crazy. That I am not going to be able to think right or get my work to come out of my mouth correctly. My perception of things will seem to shift and I won’t be able to tell what day it is and whether I am coming or going. It’s hard to face the pain of the revelation of a lie in a relationship, to lose so much at one time and know that it’s not meant for that to be recovered.
The daze is clouding my judgement, through tears of pain, disappointment and discouragement. Reality? That bills are due, past due, and have no clue how they will get paid…… that I don’t know where the next meal is coming from to the next…. that I have been in physical pain in my body that haunts me with a possible future diagnosis… that my heart can’t take another breaking from men that mean me no good are worth a penny of my time spent with them…. the daze of the haze in my face is real and its smothering me.
Never to give Satan praise, but the acknowledgment of my test and trials are for the set up of my victory dance. The spirit of depression taunts me, and it seems as if I am the only one facing these battles. Reality? I know that’s not true but the Daze of the Haze in my Face makes me feel that way.
Anybody has a fan that I can borrow? I would love to blow this all the way away!
The Joy of the Lord is my strength! I am waiting for my Joy to come like it never has, my cup to overflow! Lord Please, Blow this Haze away!
My new church is exciting and I praise God that I am there! I joined a new singing group that will make me take my vocals and praise to another level! Hair school is going great as I learn all these new skills, and I have family and friends that have nevered faulterd there love and commitment to our relationships. So, I know my joy is here just waiting for me to activate it and seek him for the rest of my blessings….